World’s Coolest Governor Rick Perry Disses “No Texting While Driving” Bill

New poll shows Perry's approval rating at 100% among teens

Mere moments after photographic evidence of his sweet guitar hero moves surfaced, 47^th Governor of Texas but original Party Animal Rick Perry continued his campaign to lock up the teen vote.  Gov. Perry slammed a bill proposed by Dean of Students State Representative Tom Craddick that would outlaw texting while driving and, presumably, partying, calling the measure a “government effort to micromanage… behavior” and “super lame.” The Governor then made guitar noises with his mouth, which sources report sounded like “ba-wow.

In a statement, Perry spokesperson Lucy Nashed noted that Texan law already prohibits cell phone use while driving for those under 18.  Why not expand the law to those over 18?  “Because suck it underclassmen!  Seniors rule!  SENIORS RULE!” yelled Governor Perry while doing sick nasty doughnuts on his hog and still making guitar noises with his mouth.  He really likes making guitar noises with his mouth.

Naturally, Perry’s opposition to the measure has drawn the ire of professional buzzkill Tom Craddick (R-Middleton). ““If we get the bill passed, I do intend to go talk to [Perry],” said Rep. Craddick, who claims he doesn’t engage in text messaging at all, driving or not. “It’s all about saving lives, not about whether I text or not.”

Craddick was last seen giving Rick Perry detention for being too much of a party dude, while Rick Perry was last seen sneaking out of detention to win the big Spring Break skateboarding competition.  Teens rule, adults drool!  Ba-WOW!