Now Arkansas, you didn’t think we forgot about you, did you? We know, sometimes it’s hard to compete in the news cycle, what with Minnesota Republicans campaigning in liberal synagogues on Yom Kippur and Texas Representatives telling Pakistani-American law students to go back to Afghanistan.
But guess what, Arkansas? Today is your day!! Because one of your state representatives, Jon Hubbard (R-Jonesboro), has written a veritable treasure trove of derp-nuggets. And then after Hubbard wrote all those derp-nuggets, he set them down, took a deep breath, read them over again with a clear head, and decided “yes, this is exactly what I want to say; this is brilliant,” and then he sent them off to a publisher, had them bound into a book, and began selling it on Amazon. It’s called Letters to the Editor: Confessions of a Frustrated Conservative. Let’s have a look!
Derp Nugget #1: Slavery was actually a blessing for black people.
“… the institution of slavery that the black race has long believed to be an abomination upon its people may actually have been a blessing in disguise. The blacks who could endure those conditions and circumstances would someday be rewarded with citizenship in the greatest nation ever established upon the face of the Earth.” (Pages 183-89)
Derp Nugget #2: Wouldn’t it be great if black people stopped being so ignorant all the time?
“Wouldn’t life for blacks in America today be more enjoyable and successful if they would only learn to appreciate the value of a good education?” (Page 184)
Derp Nugget #3: Integration made white people dumber and lazier.
“… one of the stated purposes of school integration was to bring black students up to a level close to that of white students. But, to the great disappointment of everyone, the results of this theory worked exactly in reverse of its intended purpose, and instead of black students rising to the educational levels previously attained by white students, the white students dropped to the level of black students. To make matters worse the lack of discipline and ambition of black students soon became shared by their white classmates, and our educational system has been in a steady decline ever since.” (Page 27)
Derp Nugget #4: If only black people would be more inclusive and contribute to society.
“… will it ever become possible for black people in the United States of America to firmly establish themselves as inclusive and contributing members of society within this country?” (Page 187) [Dolt Ed. Note: Totally!! We can’t think of a single black person who has contributed to American society.]
Derp Nugget #5: Immigration will lead to “extermination”:
..the immigration issue, both legal and illegal… will lead to planned wars or extermination. Although now this seems to be barbaric and uncivilized, it will at some point become as necessary as eating and breathing.” (Page 9)
Derp Nugget #6: WTF is this supposed to mean????
“American Christians are assuming a similar stance as did the citizens of Germany during Hitler’s rise to power.” (Page 158)
*If you need to purchase some mind bleach after reading all that, please do us a favor and purchase it on Amazon.com through this helpful link we are providing.
**Hubbard is up for reelection this year. Here is a link to his Democratic opponent, Harold Copenhaver, in case you want to donate. (The Daily Dolt has no association with either of these candidates. We just feel bad for the people living in Arkansas who are not actually fuck-wads, including the 16% black population there.)